In this chapter I draw attention to the common ground between Nietzsche and the Laozi 老子 on the all-important and ever-widening discrepancy between human hubris and cosmic humility. Since there has been little to no direct influence of classical Chinese sources on the development of Nietzsche’s philosophy, the debate has to be simulated. This will be done by invoking the modern phenomena of transhumanism and posthumanism. A meaningful dialogue then takes shape between Nietzsche and the Laozi on the future of humankind as it trails the meanders of the dialectic between human hubris and cosmic humility. Although the status of Nietzsche as intellectual godfather of the transhumanist movement can be disputed, a fresh look at scholarship on the topic unearths important congruities between his philosophy and contemporary transhumanism. At the same time, the link between the Laozi and what we now call posthumanism is not yet fully appreciated in contemporary academic discourse. The present chapter therefore seeks to explore both key affinities between Nietzsche’s work and various transhumanist pursuits as well as the contemporary relevance of the Laozi for posthumanism. The functional—but often overlooked—divide between trans- and posthumanism that this study reveals, contributes to a welcome critique of the twenty-first century Mass Media Human.