There has been recognition of how militarised identities, cultures and combat roles in war are linked to disproportionate mental health struggles during military-civilian transitions (Gordon et al. in Frontiers in Public Health 8:50, 2020). Drawing on in-depth visual and narrative interviews with ex-military personnel, I share participants’ experiences of becoming militarised and delivering state violence as a British soldier in the ‘war on terror’. I argue that identity and mental health struggles in post-military life reflect dimensions of trained, embodied state violence, compounded by inadequate social support structures, rather than individual suffering or mental health ‘disorders’. In doing so, I draw attention to the need to develop research, policy and practice around ‘un-training’ militarisation and healing the harms of war through bodily, somatic therapies.